Monday, September 23, 2013

Confessions of a Stay at Home Mom: I do not think my job is harder...or easier

I hear (or more over hear) conversations about people thinking Stay at Home Mom's have an easy job or SAHM's thinking they have a harder job than working moms.  Or working mom's wishing they could "take a nap".  I arrive at this conclusion particularly from other blogs I read and facebook posts.  It seems like such a pointless topic, but yet here I am posting about it.  I think I just want to set the record straight what I think for anyone who reads this blog, which it seriously might only be my mom and close friends.  In which case, this is not new information.

I am a SAHM.  Always have been and we always knew we would make the career and financial sacrifice to make that possible.  I always will be.  I do not think I have a job any harder than any other person, it is just different.  The demands are different.  The hours are different.  The vacation and sick policy are quite unique.  But one things is certain, I do not think it is harder.

I hear many SAHM's say things like, it is harder than a job that pays money because..."I am always on duty". "I do not get vacation" (assuming or definition of vacation is leaving your "job" to take a break), "I do not earn money for my job", "I do not get a break because my job is always with me", "I don't have sick days", "I do not get a break during the day".  And there are many more.  I have said these things before too, but that does not indicate my job is harder---those are just the things that make it unique and challenging.  NOT HARDER!  Its all just whining when it is done with the "my job is harder" perspective.  Wah, Wah, Wah....suck it up!

I also do not think it is any easier.  I would not know truly if this is the case since I have not worked a full time job since I had children, but I know people who have.  And so far, they agree---it is not any easier to stay at home than work.

I hear working mom's say things like, staying at home is easier than working because..."You can do your house work during the day", "You can nap", "You do not have set hours", "You can run errands", "You do not have to split your time between work and kids", "When I come home from work, I am tired from working all day then I 'have to take care of my kids too'".  And there are so many more!  These are the challenges of being a working mom---not the things that make staying at home EASIER.  When I hear "I wish I could stay at home like you, it would be so much easier", all I can think is "the grass is always greener"...wah wah wah---suck it up!

We all made the choices for our families, whether to work or be at home, for our own reasons.  I just wish we would all take responsibilities for our decisions instead of whining about it and always thinking the other situation is "easier".

Suck it up ladies and be happy with your decision OR DO SOMETHING ABOUT IT AND CHANGE IT!  I assure you, where there is a will there is a way.  If you want to work, do not complain about it--DO IT.  Be brave, be willing to fight to find the next best child care to you possible!  And stop at nothing to find the job YOU WANT, make it worth the time away from your kids.

If you work and want to be at home with your cuties---DO IT! Be brave enough to make the financial sacrifices needed to make it happen, even if that means you downsize your house (size and/or luxury downsizing), cutting off you precious cable or iphone!

So.  No more whining?  Thanks!

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