We are thrilled to
**FINALLY** announce we are expecting our third little miracle, on April 22, 2014 (my birthday as well, how exciting)! The Grant Gang is ready to add another member to smother with love. This makes me almost 16 weeks as I write this.
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Opting for a third gender surprise, we affectionately refer to this little love nugget as,
Rhema.
Rhema is the greek word referring to “an utterance” or “thing said” from a portion of scripture that speaks very specifically to the believer reading. We chose this name because we feel like our children have taught us more about God and our faith than anything else we have encountered so far.
I cannot share the joy of adding
Rhema to our family without sharing the bittersweet story of
Rhema’s sibling,
Olive. We discovered we were pregnant in late July; normally we do not have ultrasounds or doctor appointments until 9-11 weeks, however this time we were required to have an early ultrasound around 6 weeks. Much to our surprise, we learned we were expecting TWINS—-we saw a tiny precious stow away which we named
Olive (Olive branches remind us in scripture of new life, recall the dove that brought Noah the olive branch to indicate new life was growing and the waters were receding). Since each baby had surprisingly strong heartbeats, we were given every reason to believe they would both survive.
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Olive (baby b), Rhema (baby a)
they were only 2 days difference in size here |
We were filled with so many emotions, mostly thankfulness that God entrusted us with not one but TWO lives this pregnancy. Sure four kids four and under would be hard but we knew God would provide. I tried not get too excited but I could not help but dream of my
Rhema and
Olive being loved on by my sweet Addison and Caleb.
On October 15, I went for an ultrasound to ensure both were growing properly. Although the ultrasound techs are not allowed to say anything, I could tell within moments that my little
Olive was gone. Although, I could have gotten worse news that gloomy day it was still heartbreaking to learn we lost our baby—the baby whose heartbeat we fell in love with. Only
Rhema, our special survivor, was in there.
Olive was gone.
Matthew was not present at the appointment (he was taking care of the kids), but God sent us a sweet doctor with tremendous compassion and a like minded view of the value of life. I have never known a physician to show he cared so much about a situation. He even personally did another ultrasound and walked me through every body part and explained how normally everything was developing and reassured me at that point,
Rhema was very healthy. I have not met many doctors who care like he did. God sent us that specific doctor, a compassionate believer, because Matthew could not be there—even in that moment God had us in His hands comforting us.
I will never ever forget the one we lost and one day I will tell
Rhema how special he/she is. Olive was a little person, heartbeat and everything so I know I will meet them one day; just not in this life! As I told Addison, “
Olive had very important Heavenly purposes”
(more on this conversation later because did not know Olive and Rhema were ours at the time I told her this). One thing I do know: God will receive all the glory from this someday. He always does.
For me the grief comes in waves. Some days it is hard to see any twins because the dreams of my two are still so fresh. Other days I look at my Addison and Caleb and I am filled with such joy, I forget about the pain of the loss. And still other days, I am filled with fear for
Rhema’s survival. More importantly, I remember God is so gracious. While we suffered a loss, he gave us another life to nurture. So, I consider myself a mommy to four, three still with me and one in heaven—and what a wonderful meeting that will be in heaven!
Please join us as we pray for our
Rhema, truly a miracle, to join us safely and healthy in April/May. The last two heartbeat checks the last two weeks for
Rhema were a strong 152 and 130, praise God! My next midwife appointment is not for another 2.5 weeks so I am feeling VERY anxious to check on Rhema....not to mention anxious for the reassuring movements to begin!
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| Rhema 10.15.13 |
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Rhema's sweet face 10.15.13
5 weeks
I was already showing (I was SO small before this) and it was because, as we would soon learn, it was twins at that point
7 weeks
9/10 weeks
The think we lost Olive shortly after this.
12 weeks
12 weeks
15 weeks
I have not gotten much bigger since about because of the whirlwind :)
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